Here we are, back to my journal, a blog that I want to be successful someday, especially as I realize that verbally and within writing I have a command of the English language I did not realize was a part of my life. Yet it is finals time, I have one day to prepare for a Math final, and I sit in the cafeteria “preparing” for my history final. I currently am looking at my life in such a way that does not allow me to properly understand the emotional issues I am dealing with while also being cognitively aware that I am suffering from something that is making me villainize myself in such a visceral way that cannot be expressed. Time to push through all of that for final exams right? I thought that was the right option for the last three semesters, and I scored the highest in my classes, which made me only further reinforce that thought. When bad habits work they only support their own toxicity.
And now after two exams, a bungled discussion with my teacher about my Math exam and overall a crazy day I sit here, realizing, I can finally. Relax. Yet I do not want to, now I want to write, now I want to do something I want to start a business idea and flesh it out. There will be changes made to the blog, some good, some bad, some in the middle, some on time, some late, and some that will never be seen coming. Then I will keep it up because I only have one course for the next almost ten months. Oh I don’t even know what to say anymore, I’m elated that I can finally breathe, it has been a long two years, and now I am here, progressing in a way I never expected to be possible.
Imagine if I had known all I know now back when I started this over the summer, I would have never wrote any of it, why write it when I can just think it? I would not have fun doing it now, and suddenly I am at the point where it seems so easy to sit down and write these blogs, short and sweet, with positive messages of personal achievement. If you have enjoyed these blogs, make sure you are sharing them with you friends, make sure you are rereading them so you do not miss the message. If you have any questions comment and I shall do my best to respond, and last but not least thank you, for being you.